Just three weeks away from the 1st professional exams…There was hardly any sleep for us.Getting up earlyin the morning before even the sun could rise, and then throughout the study ,strain our eyes and rattle our brains over those never ending chapters of anatomy, physiology & Biochemistry.One used to struggle to keep awake in the night with the mosquitoes hovering around, and thus making the situation even more difficult. An even TOUGHER one.The week before the profs is no time to consider trivial matters like food or friendships.There is minutia to cram and slides to study. Sleep? Sleep is for law students, We’ve got work to do. With hundreds of pages of physiology notes piling up around me I struggled to keep it all straight.
Finally our hard work paid off. We stepped into a whole new world which was long waited for. There was excitement about simply everything-clinical,hospitals , operation theaters , coloured clothes(this coming 1st on the list for most of us),journey to the hospital, flinging the stethoscope around the neck…It was a world of COLOURED fantasies.I was definitely in my second year freedom. It was awesome to see just how far I have come since last year. I remember going through all of the rooms in awe of the vast knowledge of the second years and envious of their status.
We had come out of the cocoon of Normalcy & with thestart of pathology started the pathological changes.In our clinical we had to stand for hours at stretch which made me feel so weak at the end of the day. Myfears were worsened when at the surgery OPD I chancedto see a case of varicose veins. I emulated the similar symptoms. Oh! How much I freaked. My fearsabout Varicose Veins were overcome by a change of focus towards the acute abdominal pain I was having. Now I had more things to worry about,…acute appendicitis, acute regional ileitis, mesenteric lymphadenitis, ulcerative colitis(not relating to my age and predisposing factors), amoebic liver abscess, acute pancreatitis, etc. I shrieked this time. Our repeated visits to the OT made me more apprehensive about the whole situation, what if I required any surgical intervention for any of the above diseases I harbored. Those were the dreadful days of the surgery posting.
The medicine posting brought some respite. At least ththe SOB (shortness of breath), I felt I was having,did not by first choice require any surgery. On auscultation of my breath sounds for a few days I only heard ronchi & crepitations. My blood pressure was shooting & pulse was collapsing. Oh! how much I was missing those physio days when everythingwas NORMAL.
Even the appearance of one minor symptom seemed to be a part of this major SYNDROME what made me more paranoid was the fact that the no. of syndromes listedin my medical dictionary went far beyond myimagination.The regular routine of cutting my nails became a nightmare when i started checking for clubbing. Knowing that i didn'thave the following-Lung abscess,bronchiectasis,cynotic congenital heartdisease, ulcerative colitis,infective endocarditis,crohns disease,bronchiogenic carcinoma etc.It still didn't deter me from inspecting mynails and discovering this rare discovery.
But i didn't restrict this to myself only,recently when I was in the Ophthal posting I remember inspecting weary eyes of people aound me, for any signs of conjunctival congestion,Ptosis,stabismus,cataract,pterygium...
I don't remember the number of times I have embarrassed myself and others by a not so simple inference of a hypo pigmented area of skin to be a probable fungal infection.My extreme sorry to those in whom it didn't turn out to beso.
I now relate to the fact that " A little knowledge is DANGEROUS".I realised i had wat is known as NOSOPHOBIA.On searching the net I found that It has been reported that medical students frequently develop groundless fears and symptoms of illness. This has been termed "medical student's disease," "hypochondriasis of medical students," "nosophobia," and "medical studentitis." The reactions are often comparatively shortlived, although repeated, and associated with a disease being studied at the time .Hypochondriasis is common in primary care and general hospital settings. Transient hypochondriasis has been reported in 70% of medical students. The definition of hypochondriasis is a persistent, unrealistic preoccupation with the possibility of having a serious disease. Common, normal sensations and appearances are often misinterpreted as abnormal and signs of disease.The many famous sufferers include Immanuel Kant, Beethoven, and Samuel Johnson. Charles Darwin began a lifetime of suffering as a medical student.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Monday, July 10, 2006
A waif
Though I don't even rate my poetry skill as average.But when I did try out my hand at it. I guess the result wasn't too bad also(keeping my own parameters in mind)...
Eyes overflowing with tears,
head throbbing with pain,
lungs gasping for air,
Wounded heart bleeding.
Unwary of future,
wry smile, dismay,
such mental turmoil,
extricating from the mortal coil.
Withered,wandering,waiting......
For those outstretched hands.
For that gentle loving touch.
For noon naps in mama's lap.
Love,care,security,home thats
what she asks for.
Ludicrous!! Tender age of six.
Failing little jaunty steps.
Searching what lay below her,
for anything but blood.
Lump throat,hands trembling,
Legs failing,heart pounding
Eyes blinding with tears,
'Mama,mama! Its Kristie! Me!'
Jolting the lifeless pale body
which lay,lacking its warmth
Perfect sky was torn apart,
Intense ball of heat stared,
Clouds glared,
The silence was deafening,
Loneliness was killing.
Warring states had nothing to win.
But everything to lose,
Dilapidated houses,bloody lakes,
orphans,hunger struck,limping sapiens,
Doomsday!! That was it........
Eyes overflowing with tears,
head throbbing with pain,
lungs gasping for air,
Wounded heart bleeding.
Unwary of future,
wry smile, dismay,
such mental turmoil,
extricating from the mortal coil.
Withered,wandering,waiting......
For those outstretched hands.
For that gentle loving touch.
For noon naps in mama's lap.
Love,care,security,home thats
what she asks for.
Ludicrous!! Tender age of six.
Failing little jaunty steps.
Searching what lay below her,
for anything but blood.
Lump throat,hands trembling,
Legs failing,heart pounding
Eyes blinding with tears,
'Mama,mama! Its Kristie! Me!'
Jolting the lifeless pale body
which lay,lacking its warmth
Perfect sky was torn apart,
Intense ball of heat stared,
Clouds glared,
The silence was deafening,
Loneliness was killing.
Warring states had nothing to win.
But everything to lose,
Dilapidated houses,bloody lakes,
orphans,hunger struck,limping sapiens,
Doomsday!! That was it........
My article
This is the article I wrote for my college magazine-
SEARCH ENGINE...
After much procrastination and thinking of the point of it all, I finally got down to writing an article on the eve of the last day of submission. I had an exhaustive list of ideas but somehow it never worked out. Blame it on the prevailing atmosphere of indolent tranquility after exams or my own laziness.
My ideas ranged from hostel-life to clinical posting; I thought it was too used an idea and too conflicting. But it seemed to be a tried and tested topic, a lot had been already written on it and still loads left to be written but I was sure that I wasn't going to be the one bringing the missing pieces together. In desperation I even thought of writing medical jargon!AIDS, malaria, TB were on the top of my list. Probably some evil soul had got into me for my thoughts to approach such extremes! But in true terms I thought of some serious writing. Going on the same lines, smoking seemed to be a good thought provoking idea because it was as burning a issue as a cigarette in a smoker's hand. Hoping the conceptualization of the whole thing would deter at least some if not all. Debating the whole thing I finally realized it was only self motivation or in extreme(desperate cases) the agony faced that could be the only deterrence.
On the personal front, amongst a few ideas were experience of my first injection,when I was obviously not on the receiving end ; transition from black and white to a colored life which I'm certain that the IV semester students will be able to appreciate the most, at present;days of slogging, those endless, testing, tyrannizing times; being at the receiving end of a viva, living in a foreign land that is “heaven on earth”; learning Creole, facing the mockery all way long but then finally getting the lingo right ; journey back home(including the whole rush about the air tickets,discounts, cancellations, postponements) .... the sweat & tears shed in that; long awaited holidays, the countdown beginning from anywhere between 100-60 days before & cheers heralding the d-day's arrival!
There was help, motivation, more ideas offered from friends but in vain. To mention a few, synopsis of some book, Mauritian hospitality,some world event, the reservation issue in India(this I thought was quite a relevant and apt topic),medical discoveries(here I would like to mention that I wanted to be original so as long as I hadn't made the discoveries, I didn't want to write about them), medical interventions,tourist spots in Mauritius( well, a tourist booklet would be a better guide than my article, I thought) and some suggested me to write a fictitious one act play if writing a short story required too much thought but writing fiction was never my cup of tea & neither was i ever good at it. For the kind of gastronome I am, I thought of writing about my relentless quest for the perfect recipe. As far as Spiritual awakening,karma,reincarnation are concerned they went way over my head. How about writing about the world wide web, social networking,Wi-Fi !! Well, i guess one of the most in- things,but requiring some technical knowledge which i had still to acquire.
Thus, you can imagine how much of thought, time, energy and but obvious procrastination to the extreme it had taken for me to finally sit and mull over the entire thing.
It took French scientists Calmette and Guerin 260 subcultures of virulent strain of myobacterium bovis over a period of 13 years to evolve the strain bacille Calmette Guerin or BCG(source: Park's textbook of preventive and social medicine)! So i guess my odds aren't that bad also.
Scanning though the entire list of ideas & topics I had in mind I assume nothing could have been better for me than to write about what to write!! And my search for the topic finally ending with it.
'Rise,awake &shine' and so it was to be that I'm typing this article. My race against the time and the submission date,of course!!
SEARCH ENGINE...
After much procrastination and thinking of the point of it all, I finally got down to writing an article on the eve of the last day of submission. I had an exhaustive list of ideas but somehow it never worked out. Blame it on the prevailing atmosphere of indolent tranquility after exams or my own laziness.
My ideas ranged from hostel-life to clinical posting; I thought it was too used an idea and too conflicting. But it seemed to be a tried and tested topic, a lot had been already written on it and still loads left to be written but I was sure that I wasn't going to be the one bringing the missing pieces together. In desperation I even thought of writing medical jargon!AIDS, malaria, TB were on the top of my list. Probably some evil soul had got into me for my thoughts to approach such extremes! But in true terms I thought of some serious writing. Going on the same lines, smoking seemed to be a good thought provoking idea because it was as burning a issue as a cigarette in a smoker's hand. Hoping the conceptualization of the whole thing would deter at least some if not all. Debating the whole thing I finally realized it was only self motivation or in extreme(desperate cases) the agony faced that could be the only deterrence.
On the personal front, amongst a few ideas were experience of my first injection,when I was obviously not on the receiving end ; transition from black and white to a colored life which I'm certain that the IV semester students will be able to appreciate the most, at present;days of slogging, those endless, testing, tyrannizing times; being at the receiving end of a viva, living in a foreign land that is “heaven on earth”; learning Creole, facing the mockery all way long but then finally getting the lingo right ; journey back home(including the whole rush about the air tickets,discounts, cancellations, postponements) .... the sweat & tears shed in that; long awaited holidays, the countdown beginning from anywhere between 100-60 days before & cheers heralding the d-day's arrival!
There was help, motivation, more ideas offered from friends but in vain. To mention a few, synopsis of some book, Mauritian hospitality,some world event, the reservation issue in India(this I thought was quite a relevant and apt topic),medical discoveries(here I would like to mention that I wanted to be original so as long as I hadn't made the discoveries, I didn't want to write about them), medical interventions,tourist spots in Mauritius( well, a tourist booklet would be a better guide than my article, I thought) and some suggested me to write a fictitious one act play if writing a short story required too much thought but writing fiction was never my cup of tea & neither was i ever good at it. For the kind of gastronome I am, I thought of writing about my relentless quest for the perfect recipe. As far as Spiritual awakening,karma,reincarnation are concerned they went way over my head. How about writing about the world wide web, social networking,Wi-Fi !! Well, i guess one of the most in- things,but requiring some technical knowledge which i had still to acquire.
Thus, you can imagine how much of thought, time, energy and but obvious procrastination to the extreme it had taken for me to finally sit and mull over the entire thing.
It took French scientists Calmette and Guerin 260 subcultures of virulent strain of myobacterium bovis over a period of 13 years to evolve the strain bacille Calmette Guerin or BCG(source: Park's textbook of preventive and social medicine)! So i guess my odds aren't that bad also.
Scanning though the entire list of ideas & topics I had in mind I assume nothing could have been better for me than to write about what to write!! And my search for the topic finally ending with it.
'Rise,awake &shine' and so it was to be that I'm typing this article. My race against the time and the submission date,of course!!
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